Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
We have started to decorate penises.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize
