Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize
