so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Randomize
