it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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