how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize
