so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
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