the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
Randomize
