we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize