I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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