Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
