It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize