I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
he puts the penis in happiness.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
