he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
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