he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize