Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
This gyro tastes like lonliness
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
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