Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
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