Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize