Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Randomize
