Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Randomize
