dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
She bit a glass in half.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Randomize
