Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
last night I used snow as a chaser
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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