on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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