Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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