he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Randomize
