puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
