So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Randomize
