Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Randomize
