? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
