Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Randomize
