Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
She just used a chaser for red wine.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
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