dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I'm drive I can fine osifer
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Randomize
