: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
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