i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
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