So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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