does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize