i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
