i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
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