I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
How external is "for external use only"?
Sorry my hands just texted you
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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