He is such a slut. More and more my type.
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Randomize