I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Randomize
