You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
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