Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Randomize