We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize