whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
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