oh god the rape fog is back!
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
