I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
