i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Randomize
