I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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