we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Randomize
