People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
Randomize
